The biggest question is why.
I have wanted to be a doctor for a long time, even though I have had other thoughts about other careers, medicine has always been a recurring option. Every step I take in this journey, the harder it gets. I have to admit that I have had times where I wanted to give up but the reason why I want to be a doctor prevailed.
There are many reasons why I want to be come a doctor but I never thought in depth why until a few years back. There was a mate in my class who was struggling to do his work. It wasn’t because he was unable to do it but it was because he wasn’t able to engage with the task. He started to disrupt the class and then had an altercation with the teacher, he shouted ” why am I even doing this? It’s pointless!”
At the time, I reflected on what just happened and I wondered the same thing. When am I going to need all the 10 other subjects i am taking? My answer was simple: the grades to get into medical school.
Back then, this reason was good enough, but the pressure hit me when I started my GCSE’s. The lack of understanding the why behind becoming a doctor was limited to: I like helping people and I love biology. It came to one point where I felt hopeless and I asked myself what is the point and still came up with the same answer.
I did it again, I asked myself why at A level and this is why…
From my volunteering experience I have found that there isn’t anything more satisfying than sitting with a person and just talking. Getting to know who they are and their experiences is amazing. What is even more amazing is for a random person, who you have never met before, to tell you everything about them, to tell you their deepest thoughts and cry on your shoulder. I have witnessed and experienced the repercussions of what it feels like to lose someone you care about.
So when I ask myself why am I learning about something that is boring this is what I think: it may not directly link to medicine but it does directly link to the fundamental knowledge of what is required of a doctor, with out this knowledge I will not be able to progress onto more advance knowledge and therefore I cannot learn about how to save and improve lives.
This means I will not be able to allow other people to continue making new memories and continue sharing their experiences.
I will not be able to save people from losing a loved one.
Don’t let your situation define you, let your why define you.